This blog, like many other blogs I have written in my life, was triggered by a book I am reading. The book I am reading right now is called Krishna: The man and his philosophy by Osho. I don’t believe in religion for sure and was a little skeptical about reading this. But it came up in a conversation with a friend and I liked what he was talking about. I decided to read it and one of the lines that struck me from the book was The word bliss is without an opposite. And I asked myself, what is the opposite of bliss? I couldn’t find an answer. We talk of most feelings in pair: love-hate, joy-sorrow, pleasure-pain but bliss is just bliss.
As I mentioned in some of my blogs from January, I started meditating this year. I had started to not like myself because I was always ready to snap. I had long thought of myself as a cool and composed person but that had started becoming more of a fictional character. So I turned to meditation to channel some of these energies.
Meditation is a fun activity when you don’t rush it or force it. I started meditating regularly and most days tried to do it in a part of my day where I wasn’t time pressed. Once I started to clear my head of the everyday thoughts about work, traffic, food, money, TV, technology etc I got a little more mental room to follow some of the other thoughts that would pop up. Earlier I would have run out of time or energy to even consider such thoughts but I felt more upbeat after starting to meditate.
The last time I took a lesson in physics was probably way back in 2006 or 2007. It’s been almost a decade yet I consider myself an astrophysics enthusiast. There are various facets of physics that I really love. Every time I think about them I feel like I understand people and the world a little better. There are two ideas that I like to wonder about: Making sense of chaos and quantum entanglement.
It’s hard to imagine how physics can help us understand people. Physics usually describes properties of inanimate things and conscious decisions can seem inherently chaotic. Imagine for a moment that the gas inside a balloon is made up of millions of particles, which it is. Imagine now the movement of these particles. Their motion is inherently random and chaotic and it is unlikely to be predicted.
Did I wake up? Am I asleep?
It’s all so confusing right now
I wash my face, I brush my teeth
And find myself in bed again!
Its a long day
I’ve been up for long.
Have been running all along.
And now its starting to show
Been running to home, Yet
Cant find it where I left
Its empty and cold every time
I open the door
All the words i had, vanished
Somewhere along this road i walk
Flowing like water at times
Or stuck behind a block
I can hear the thunder and the waves
Something seems to be closing in
I struggle hard to remain outside
But finally it engulfs me
<This is purely a work of fiction, and bears no resemblance to any person dead or alive.>
It was a bad day. Everything seemed to be screwed up. I was in one of those crazy moods, wanting to do something crazy. But what could be done, i wondered, that i have not done before? Fortunately i found one. Gravity Bong. Its a classic way of smoking tobacco, or weed etc. And it has a certain impact too. So i took not 1 or 2, but 3 shots ( or whatever you may call it ). The first 2 were light ones, but the 3rd was a full impact thing.
At first nothing changed. Then slowly, things started slowing down. I can compare it to a movie playing, at a much slower frame rate. Initially i could hear, and see, and process them instantaneously. Slowly i could see with pauses. The audio processing also slowed, and sometimes i missed scenes or voices, or both. Initially calm, but with this rate of slowing increasing, i panicked. I tried to have some water. Then i felt i would die. I was calling out for a doctor. It felt, that if i closed my eyes, i would pass out. Out of this world almost.