April 23

The Cycle of Things

Life seems so erratic. It seems like there is a routine. An order, a cycle in things, in almost each way nature manifests itself. The same is with life. We love routine (most of us). We feel comfortable settling into a routine. The same way there is a cycle. A cycle of emotions, a cycle of mood, a cycle of give and take.

The cycle of mood, what’s it about I wonder? I take it to describe myself. There are usually 2 phases in it. The ‘Outgoing’ phase and the ‘Quiet’ phase. They dont exactly fit the literal meaning of the words. In the quiet phase for example, you may talk a lot at times. But inside you feel alone; quiet, not willing to reach out to anyone or anything for support. You are a rebel, and are tired with the wrongs of the world, not wanting to become a part of this routine, just want everything to be silent. There is a lingering sense of pain too. It’s as if, you suffer, and choose to. Because only through this silence, do I understand and prepare for the next phase.

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April 13

Crazy Love

I feel like writing a story. Not fiction exactly. Just a better way to convey thoughts than writing the facts straight out. It contains a message, rather a collection of thoughts. About human behavior, or the common sense prevailing in today’s world.

(All names are fictional)

There is a girl Naina. There is a boy Rahul. And then there is another guy X (me). I and Naina are friends. But unlike the usual thing, I don’t love Naina. I rather find her a bit crazy and dumb. Obviously I could ignore the facts, and still try to get in her pants. But I don’t whatever the reason.
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April 8

Love : Spiritual or Material

I have been wondering about Love again. Is it something spiritual or material. I mean there was a time when i considered it something of mind, of thought, of something close to god. And yet, it suddenly feels like a necessity like money, mobile etc.

Its as if, i sometimes have these sudden desperate want of love, and then at other times i shun it as if a unnecessary need. The same way we do try to avoid some of the luxuries of life. You want to abstain from it, abstain from the material needs. And then there are these impulsive moments when you long for all of it. Just like what happens with love.
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April 4

MDI: Interview experiences

Well giving an interview, when you know it could be the most important one for you, sure is tough. To add to it, having the last interview is even weirder. You are surrounded by sea of emotions. So was the case with me, the last interview and quite an important one too (if not the most important yet). There were 2 people a Lady Prof (LP) and Male Prof (MP), and of course me.

I entered the room, and was asked to sit down. Said the thanks, and sat down.

MP: So how are you feeling? How are you feeling about having the last interview?
Me: Obviously it increases anxiety. People come out and give you so many opinions, insights etc. You get anxious what’s going to happen every moment.
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